Wouldn't that be something if actually sporting a juicy whitehead became the new black white black. Hey, tapered jeans are back baby, so let's not rule this one out just yet. I thought I'd jump on the wagon early, and list the governing rules for Pimple Pampering. If nothing else this should send my PageRank through the roof.

Let's get started then shall we?

Name It
If you want your pimple to flourish, you're gonna need to become attached to it. The easiest way to do that is to personify it. Give it a name. Yes, you can use an alliteration such as Peter the Pimple, or Willum the Whitehead. There are no wrong answers here, and that's important to remember. Now that you have a name, it'll be easier to avoid trying to squeeze that motherfuton because in your mind you'll be thinking, I'm not a killer, Peter, I am not a killer.

Nurture It
The idiots who bought pet rocks as kids are the same folks who are gonna be living and dying by this methodology, so I'll use a metaphor that touches close to home for ya. Nurture your pimple. Unlike your inannimate rock, your pimple is a living, breathing, hopefully growing organism. It deserves your love and attention. Put some Crisco on it, or rub a stick of butter across it now and again, don't be shy. Just be sure not to do any damage to puffy Peter.

Neglect It
I know, it seems like I'm contradicting myself here, but that is some genius guru crap that most of you wouldn't get. Neglect your pimple. Not in the sense that goes against Rule #2, but you have to remember, pimples need time to grow. They may show up overnight, but in order to get them to and through maturity, you need to give them time. All that puss is slow to get going, but given time, it will blow your mind that a clogged pore could produce that much white stuff.

Let me close by saying I'm not a scientist, but I could be one of the smartest people you've ever pretened to know. So take my word for it when I say, this stuff is the shizzlebomb; and when pimples are en vogue, you will all the wiser.

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