I want to get Green. You know, be more environmentally conscious, think about how my doings effect the world for my children, and my children's children and my children's children's children, my CCC's. I've been hearing about all kinds of corporations buying up carbon offsets, and I got to thinking, I need to get up on this.

I'm 30 years old now, and in my 30 years, I've done a lot of farting. I mean, a lot. I started to think, dang, all that gas that I passed has probably contributed to the gigantic hole in the o-zone (which of course is the cause of global warming, in this, one of the coldest winters on record)... I digress. I want to do my parts to clean up my farts. (That rhyme is completely unintentional). I digress, yet again.

So I've purchased a bunch of carbon offsets, enough to cover what I think is a healthy lifestyle of beans, califlower and other magical fruits. Of course, by purchasing these offsets, I can't take back the damage I've done, but I can feel better about myself, and really, isn't that what it's all about... Me?

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